Day 147 - Becoming Self-Honest

Q: What does this look like?

A: Every thought is considered.

When existing within the energy of a thought, it's like you just go with it, not taking a moment to breathe and see the thought in the entirety of its creation. We don't typically understand how the thought came up. We don't even like to take responsibility for them, often blaming the external reality as the cause of the thought.

We tend to miss the point of self in relation to the thought, and just go with the thought as if it is us, or we own it. Yes. We take ownership of our thoughts and conceptualize self in separation from what we think. This can look like judgment, fear, love, etc.

The point is, if we don't consider every thought, how can we be trusted as equal creators of the external reality. Our internals are so messed up with layers upon layers of self-deception within fear that we hide from thy neighbors. We are co-creators, one with all. Self-responsibility is essential.

Q: How does self-honesty come about?

A: Self-forgiveness

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to not consider each thought as equal and one with myself as the creator, and to have instead simply allowed myself to exist within the feeling or emotion that was associated with the thought.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to selectively focus on the thoughts that produced the most positive feelings and within this miss where I am in relation to the thoughts while I ride the positive feeling for as long as I can through selective thinking.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to engage in a negative thought-train whilst completely forgetting about my breath, not realizing that I've left reality to indulge in fear-based what ifs.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to get deeper and more specific, focusing most of my attention thus far on the general aspects of thought design.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to participate in the negative emotion of self-judgment for not being effective within my corrective writing because I have shied away from thorough and specific, self-honest investigation of one particular thought design at a time.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to connect failure to not seeing quick results.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to fear moving slowly, not realizing why I desire to move quickly through this process of self-correction and alignment with best-for-all interest.

I see here that I've opened several points that can be taken much deeper to reach a thoroughness that I have not yet before pushed myself to do. The list:
- desire to move quickly through process
- fear of failure
- self-judgment
- lacking specificity and depth
- fear of future within what-if thought-trains
- selective thinking / thought suppression
- riding in the emotion/feeling --> not considering origin of thought

In self-honesty, I commit myself to the process of real-time assessment of:
- Why a particular thought comes up?
- Why did I allow myself to participate in the experience of the thought?
- What connections can I make to this thinking pattern?

In self-honesty, the answers to these questions should come easily. To promote self-honesty within and as me, I have to take the answers and follow through with them. Once I locate the pattern and it's components, I commit myself to writing and moving through self-forgiveness. As the layers open up, I continue, I persist.

I commit myself to showing all that I am self-responsible within my application of self-purification for self and all in creating best for all play-outs and correcting self-interested acts/speech that is dependent on energy in polarity where the other must lose so I can win.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to to not see, realize and understand that best for all, as a way of life, is also self-interest. I realize that spite, and ego rewarding acts/speech is the self-interest that must come to an end within becoming self-honest. I commit myself to realizing how I am one with my thoughts, one with my neighbors, family and strangers, one with all life here on earth, etc. Until it is done. Until I can be proud of this existence as a whole. Until then, no bullshit. I will be watching my participation, until it is in alignment with oneness and equality. Then I participate strictly within the physical as breath, as utter self-honesty, where all thoughts are related to physical reality. Until I am directing self and thought as self here.

Still confused about Self-Honesty? There are some intensely supportive people on the forums. If you want to assist yourself with guided structure, I highly recommend this FREE course.

See you here.