Today, I went to the library to search for creative avenues that will make me money. Since graduating, I've tried buying and reselling garage sale items, and raising money with Grassroots Campaigns. I like the idea of being a middle man, a sales man, a connector, but my negotiation skills need to be improved, and I don't know how well I can do as a transparent sales person. I liked talking to people to gather support for the Nature Conservancy, but the whole time I was working for Grassroots I was just wishing that I could implement this practice for Equal Money System.
Now, I'm at the library to look into what the deal is with Tax Lien Certificates because my dad's coworker is making a bundle investing in them. Then I start considering how I haven't been following through with the idea of being an equal money supporter. It's funny how I've had an EMS badge on my facebook for quite awhile and yet neglected to really study how the system would work. So, I start researching how to find donors (with a lot of research still to come). I imagine creating an affiliate website where I could sell random life-improvement products and have the proceeds go to supporting Equal Money.
I walk out of the library with The Complete Idiot's Guide to Cashing In On Your Inventions, so I guess I'm still keeping as many creative pathways as open as possible. I have defined myself as ambitious, but also as having trouble getting projects finished without a flame under my ass. So, it's time to start becoming more effective in this world system and simultaneously support the next.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to think that I am great and powerful with all of my ambitious thoughts, like writing a movie, running a business, and saving the world, and for not realizing that without creating/writing anything here in the physical, my circular thinking amounts to nothing.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to separate myself from who I am as an effective individual by fearing failure with the implementation of my own system. I've proven to myself to be a quick learner and readily adaptable to new systems. So why don't I start creating? Fear.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to fear failure within my application and my process. I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear that I won't be able to make ends meet or pull strings together. I have the ability. What am I waiting for? Validation.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to wait for others to validate my application to minimize risk, so within that I forgive me for NOT accepting and allowing me to take the responsibility of all risk to consider how I might alleviate that risk in a more practical way.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to hesitate in supporting Equal Money System. When and as I see myself waiting for external validation or momentum to move into doing what I want to, I stop I breathe. I realize that if I am going to apply myself exactly how I want to, I must take full responsibility for my outflow.
I commit myself to supporting Equal Money System.