Day 55 - Distracted by Consciousness

All too often, I let my mind wander. In this wandering, I am not the authority. It's my mind taking me along for the ride, all the while sending me through an experience of emotion and feeling. For most of my life, I have thought that having good feelings arise because my thinking, was the the yield of happiness that I would consider myself. It was the driving force. Who I am, come to find out, is not the positive feelings that I experience on my conscious distraction journeys.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to wander about within the domain of mind/thoughts, not realizing that I am giving up my authority as who I am as life.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to hand my life over to the programmed thoughts patterns of this one world mind.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to not take responsibility for my participation within consciousness, and instead seek for external points in reality to blame and separate my self-definition from. Attempting to run from who I've accepted and allowed myself to become.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to continually smoke marijuana and support this consciousness wandering. Yeah, I just went there. I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to believe that I more enlightened when I smoke weed because it makes me feel good, and I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to support others' minds, as they're minds are one with my mind. I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to just consider the positive aspects of wed and to ignore the negative ones. I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to desire to participate in my mind differently, without taking control myself, and so turn to weed.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to become side-tracked, and to continue down that side-track that was inspired by the distraction of my consciousness, indicating that I was not present here, directing myself from the physical reality. *For more info about the difference between self direction and mind direction starting point, start investigating this desteni stuff with me.

It's free to write yourself to freedom.

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When and as I see myself thinking, I stop I breathe.

I realize that my thoughts as consciousness is a distraction from me, here.

I commit myself to continually recognizing when I am thinking in separation from the present moment that is here, and through this I commit myself to stopping the mind. No more mind control. I am here in every breath, so why do I keep giving me up to my mind?? I commit myself to stop giving myself up to the mind. ..This is going to be a long journey to life.