Day 238 - "I can't do it" in my Imagination

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I went rock climbing today for the first time in a long time, and I conveniently got a bit closer to my "I can't do it" character. There was one particular spot that I was stuck at, and my forearms were starting to turn to fire. And to reach the point of 'giving up' I had imagined the possibilities and nothing seemed to work. I couldn't make the reach. I 'gave up.'

Thankfully, my belay buddy caught me and wouldn't let me down. I was throwing a mini fit while I contemplated a second attempt with what little strength I had left. Thanks to her stubbornness, I got the chance to hang out, 40 feet above the ground, and cool off. Eventually I found the needed foot hold that I had missed while frantically imagining the possibilities that all led to failure, and I was able to finish the climb.

This imagination dimension is just one piece of this puzzle that I utilize to persuade myself that "I can't do it." I will continue to write about the other character dimensions in upcoming posts. This character is as good as any for getting acquainted with these dimensions that are behavioral blueprints of the mind in a way. I will soon make a post that overviews these character dimensions that are essentially the foundational components of each personality we have created.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to imagine the possible scenarios/options that do not work and lead to failure, instead of taking a breath and really examining all possibilities that are here.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to operate and based my decisions from an imagined version of reality.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to believe that I can imagine opportunities and the play outs of each scenario better from within my mind than I could if I was just operating within and from the physical reality.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to not trust myself to figure out what is here in a moment and so rely on my superior observational powers of imagined reality play outs.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to give up and retreat away from a goal when the going gets tough.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to accumulate imagined failure to motivate myself to become the "I can't do it" character/personality.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to not realize that I was operating from a panicked, energy state of mind when I was going through imagined possibility.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to disregard the physical and focus all my attention on a limited rendition of reality.
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When and as I see myself imagining "all" the possibilities, I stop I breathe. I realize that I may missing opportunities I haven't uploaded into my mental video player. I commit myself to flag pointing the "I can't do it" character and backtracking to see how I have convinced myself that "I can't do it."

When and as I see myself imagining failure, I stop I breathe. I realize that I have diminished what is physically here into/as a mental representation of what I think might happen. I commit myself to the realization that I am not considering reality when I am imagining. I know this will take awhile before I am comfortably living self-trust within each and every here-moment as the breath and to be able to make this my starting point of every decision. I commit myself to familiarizing myself with the character dimensions / mind blueprints so that I am able to see the activation sequence more readily. This way I will be more able and prepared to STOP the personality before it possesses me.

When and as I see myself thinking "I can't do it" because I have imagined all the possibilities and reached a conclusion of failure, I stop I breathe. I realize that if failure is inevitable from a starting point assessment based within the physical reality, I would then make a common sense decision. I realize that if failure seems likely based on a starting point of mental processing, I need to take a breath and get back to what is really here. I commit myself to stop thinking that I know it all, because from this mental 'knowing' I realize I do not know what I do not know. I breathe. I keep coming back to reality. I stop the characters when and as I see them. It could be an instant stop. It could take a month of writing. I am no longer concerned with being able to always be able to stop the character from the get-go because I realize that some of these personalities are deeply ingrained into my physical-flesh.

No more panicked judgments of reality. Slow down Dan.