I have too many points building up, to the point that I've loaded the reserves and I need to start on that which I've suppressed. It's costing me energy and my writings just can't be as effective when the point I write about is not the primary point, rather a selected point. I understand I'm doing this in a way to serve my audience. I hear from desteni that I need and must be doing this for me, alone.
So, for the sake of authenticity, this blog is going to change it's starting point. Ideally, this means every sentence, every word will be that which I chose in that moment. So, editing will be minimal, only error correction. The desire to go back and clean up my blogs exists.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to fear the judgment of others so that I feel if I fix the bad parts of my past blogs that I could be more liked.
I forgive myself for doubting myself through time.
Now, my goal is to write like I doubt ever doubt the word choice. This is a hard part for me to reconcile because I'm so used to doubting my writing and 'editing' it. To keep moving forward...in my breath I cannot fail.
...I now question writer's block. If I am here, there should never be writers block. I do see that this blog may just be the proactive I need to develop my voice to become the great author I'd like to be.
I commit myself to realize when I am forcing my words and when I am just flowing..
I forgive myself that I haven't allowed myself true freedom of expression yet. Through writing in breath and honesty, I cannot fail.
I commit myself to every second of this process. It is pervasive, all encompassing. Tomorrow I address my lack of responsibility within diet, specifically sugar cravings.
Special thanks to William Cuff for his Day 70
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