I spent the whole day flying across the country for a family reunion. There are a few moments where I experienced a light paranoia, but paranoia none the less. I'm the son of a pilot and have a fair amount of travel experience, so I'm not freaking out like some people might. The fear thoughts associated with airports and flying are different in nature but very similar in design as say, going to the dentist. Both flying and going to the dentist are things that I enjoy for their uniqueness or infrequent occurrence, but there is still subtle paranoia backchatter in the head. Examples:
- "What if there is something wrong with my ticket reservation.."
- "I hope I can find the right place to be in time for boarding.."
- "I hope the flight delay isn't so long that I miss my flight connection.."
- "I hope I don't sit next to someone annoying.."
- Another plane crashing into my plane in midair at a 90 degree angle
- Wings falling off during take off
- Malfunction of the front wheel just after landing
There are probably many more that others come up with. This list is just the basics of what I experienced. And I didn't have any physically noticeable reactions. These thoughts and visual imaginations are popping up for some reason..
I'll continue tomorrow with a walk though my self-investigation and self-forgiveness process. For now, I am tired, hungry, and in a dark hotel room filled with parents and a sibling tucked away for the night. Let the family vacation commence!