Day 442 - Speak up, son!
To be a man. To be seen as a man. To hold my body as a man. To sound like a man!
This is but one way I've oriented myself, through the backchat comparison of Self to Man.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to see myself as 'less than' those who hold themselves in this confident, present voice - one that I have not seen in me for myself.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to compare myself and my vocal expression to others firstly, trying to shape my expression in a safe and specific way, so as to hide myself, for I do not want to be judged for my authentic, self expression.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to prefer the 'safety' of projecting characters of me out in the world, instead of allowing myself, within/through Self-Acceptance, just be, and express me naturally, simply.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to create myself within and through AMBITION, not seeing realizing or understanding the significance of my starting point being rooted in fear, inferiority.
I forgive myself for not accepting and allowing myself to see myself as ACCEPTED, by all and by me -- and to ride the wave of awareness and focus as I drive me into perfect, verbal expression.
When and as I see myself getting in a head spin about not wanting to talk or speak up, because I "can't find my words" - I see and understand that there is resistance to self-honesty for one fear/reason or another.
I commit myself to slow down and get self-honest.
I commit myself to show myself that I do want to go there.
I commit myself to show COURAGE in my stand.
When and as I see myself perceiving myself as in-fear-ior to another person, I stop, I breathe. I realize my equality as 1, just as they are 1, too. I commit myself to speak with confidence, knowing what I want to say before & as I start flapping vocal chords..
I commit myself to seeing me as 1, and equal.
I commit myself to voicing myself with integrity, utilizing my body to place specific ripples into motion, bring life to words and words to life.
I commit myself to trust myself through this process.
I commit myself to stop hesitating when the Self-judger backchat starts to speak up - and to rather move into my body, find the words, and engage in co-created presence.
One.
Word.
At.
A.
Time.
OWAAT
And a sneak peak for next time:
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to believe I am inherently inferior to others to speak sense effortlessly, and seem to already have social approval/recognition - something I can only ever hope for because I perceive others to have the power of assigning acceptance to me...
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Check out process, lots happening!
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